Three Words to Weight Loss

In the struggle to lose this weight, I often find that I'm baffled over why I cheat and take a bite of something I shouldn't. Before I do, I get this crack-head feeling of "gotta have it" that just won't go away. I feel edgy, angry, and as close to snapping as a disgruntled postal worker. After the bite, guilt washes over me because I've only cheated myself. But I can never quite figure out WHY. Why do I feel this way? Why is it so uncontrollable? I quit smoking cold turkey over five years ago. It's not will power that's the problem. This caving for carbs is killing me and it's more addictive than anything I've ever tried (and I've tried a LOT of addictive things :) .

I may have found the answer. In an article on a local plastic surgery site, I read something that clicked with the information I gained in psychology classes. "At the end of the day, weight loss is really about self esteem," according to weight loss coach Bob Green. When I examine my own behavior, I think at first that this is NOT because of my self-esteem. I DO have insulin resistance and PCOS. But with a lot more reflection, I realized that it does have something to do with my emotional response to stress. I've lost 70 lbs, but in the last month I've gained 15. It started with the news that my grandmother was dying of lung cancer. I managed to keep most of my life in order, but my scrutiny over what I put in my mouth went right out the window. Why? I'm still not quite sure, but I'm gonna keep thinking.

So, according to Green, "I deserve this" should become the mantra for anyone trying to lose weight. I can agree and plan to post it around the house so that I'll see this in the early days of my turn around. Maybe it'll work.

Only time will tell.